Missing

I find myself missing you today.

Missing the conversations we so easily had.

The ones where we discussed the big and the little happening in each other's lives.

The tears and the laughter and more laughter.

Sharing hopes and dreams.

Confusions

Wondering what the future might hold

Just the easy friendship

And wondering why I have so much trouble stepping out of this house and trying to make new friends

With a heart that knows I don't always get to hold on to the friends I spent so much time getting to know

And yet, seems that that is what life is about.

You make new friends

and then life separates you as you move separate ways.

I can either move on or cling to something that isn't mine anymore,

at least not in the same way.

So, again, I have a choice.

Sit around and mope for the friendships that are not a part of my daily, weekly, monthly life anymore.

Or snap out of it and work on making new friends,

while enjoying the bits and pieces of updates on blogs and facebook,

that keep me in the loop,

at least a little bit.

And to be thankful

for the time that we did have together

and the fact that God blessed my life with such great friends,

even if it seems like it was just for a second.

I can't allow myself to grow hard

or put the walls back up to refuse to get hurt.

I am human and every friendship I make will be with other humans.

And life is SHORT!

There are no guarantees.

So, I choose...

over and over and over...

to keep putting myself out there...

to keep making new friends

and to be thankful for the time I had with old friends.

In the end...

it truly is worth it.

Despite the temporary pain

and the fact that today I am missing you.