Blessed Rest

Yesterday I found out that I am fighting off an upper respiratory infection on top of everything else.  Not surprising seeing as how I have been fighting off cold/allergy symptoms for five weeks now, and hadn't slept well since last Thursday night.  I also have already lost some weight.  They put me on an antibiotic I have never been on before and warned me to stay out of sunlight and drink lots extra.  This morning trying to get the girls ready for school and watch the little guy I babysit, I was so nauseous I wasn't sure I was going to be able to walk to school.
With everything else that has been going on, and how extremely quiet my week got, it took me a bit to figure out what my options were.  I knew that I wouldn't feel like I could rest because I was afraid I would miss something the baby needed.  I needed backup.
So I sent a text.  And it was quickly responded to.  Before lunch time, I was no longer the only adult in the house and I spent most of the rest of the day asleep when the baby was asleep.  Something I would not have been able to do without help...just knowing another person was there gave me the ability to rest.
I have discovered that in life, God does exactly that for me.  He is there, present, with me.  He provides the peace, safety, and rest that I need to be able to just let go and be.  That's never been all that easy for me, but I am definitely learning...and putting it into practice right now.  I tend to be a fixer...a do-er.  So to sit back, and let Him do all the "work" and watching to see what He will do with all of this, is new and different for me.  And not altogether comfortable.  But in the midst of it all is an underlying peace that I cannot explain outside of His presence in this.
I don't have a clue.  Honestly.  There is nothing I can do about current circumstances other than leave them in His hands, and wait.  I could be making a bigger mess out of it all if I were going around trying to fix it, or was talking to everyone in the world about it, or whatever.  But I am choosing to sit, wait, watch.  Trying to stay out of His way and let Him be God and turn this into something good.  Working on trusting, and not second-guessing everything all over again.  Resting in Him and in His promises. 
Guess what I am discovering?  Yes, every thing looks different...life is not the same.  But there are things to be thankful for, there are things that are bringing smiles to my face again, and I have made it three days now without body-wrenching sobs.  Eventually, I will even get back to the point where I can look forward to some of the big things coming up again...even though they won't be anything like what I had pictured they would be.  And in the end...at the very least...I will be stronger and more able to help others... and hopefully God's grace, love, mercy, etc will shine through every step of the way...through me, through those around me, and through the works that He does!