Bubble Wrap

I don't have a pic of bubble wrap...but this scarf almost has the same look...

Yes, I want to talk about bubble wrap...the plastic stuff that comes wrapped around something that possibly could get broken while being shipped.  The stuff that no one can resist sitting there and popping bubbles until someone else gets annoyed and takes it away.
I can't tell you how many times in my life that I have been teased about needing to be wrapped in bubble wrap.  You see, I enjoy being active.  But my body does not enjoy it.  I have had knee issues since I was 15, and originally was told I would most likely need knee replacement surgery by the age I am now.  My ankles have been twisted and sprained more times then I care to admit.  My baby toes have been broken way too often.  I have a wide variety of braces and slings.  I manage to sprain things more painfully then a break would have been...and would love to have a dollar for every time I heard my doctor tell me it would have hurt less if I had just broken "it".  (Same as I would love to have a dollar for every time that someone has said that I need to be wrapped in bubble wrap).  I tend not to let my injuries keep me from doing the things I enjoy...and I get immense enjoyment out of being active in almost any way, shape, or form with the people I love.
Besides the softball example two days ago, pitching for two hours with a jammed finger buddy taped to its partner, I could also give you the night before that as an example.  A friend of mine asked me to go skating with her and her son...there was no way that I was going to tell her that my knees were acting up because of all the storm fronts that moved through that day.  I just put one of my ace knee braces on and went and made skating memories with the two of them and my girls.  It's not something that I sit around and whine about.  It is what it is.
Now, to take this a different way...
God is my bubble wrap.  He protects me from things that I can't even see.  He wraps Himself around me as a shield, promising me in many verses in the Bible that He does this for me.  He goes before me, behind me, above me, under me, all around me...as my Protector.  He knows every single little detail that is going to happen to me or those I love, preparing me ahead of time to be strong enough to handle it all, with His help!  Talk about some powerful bubble wrap!  He's not the kind you want to pop though :)  Powerful help to have on my side!  Nothing compares.  And no matter what happens in this life, I know He is walking it with me!  I don't have to be afraid of what is coming my way, and I don't have to be worried that I won't recover.  I can just keep doing what He has asked me to do, knowing that He has all the details worked out!  I don't get sidelined with injuries, I can keep moving forward despite them.  And in all my broken places, day by day, He brings me healing from the inside out.  I might not see it today or tomorrow, but I will be able to look back and see all the many many ways He provided for me and protected me.  And on that great day when I get to see Him face to face in Heaven, He will show me times that I didn't even know about.
I am so thankful to be covered by the Ultimate "bubble wrap"!!!

Expectant hope

This concept has come up a lot lately between me and my friends.
I have decided that I am going to live my life in such a way that I am making a conscious choice to live with expectant hope.
My hope is abundantly found in God, and in all that He has promised He wants to do in my life and my daughters' lives, and what He wants to do for us and use us to do for Him.  There is amazing freedom that I have found in the idea that He can do whatever He wants, and that it will always be for my best.
I am in a period of "wait" right now.  Some of the big things that I would enjoy, I have been specifically asked to wait for until He says it is time, sometime after graduating.  He didn't say that they would happen right after graduation, just not to be expecting them before then.  But even in the time of waiting, I still have expectant hope.  I know that He is working some big things, and that they very well might blow me away (in a good way).  He has promised me, repeatedly (because He doesn't mind reassuring me), that they will be more than worth the wait, and that I will see them happen in my lifetime.  So, I live in great expectation and freedom... knowing that He has all the details under control and I will not miss getting to see Him write my story.  For me, that opens all kinds of doors right now...without the worry of how things are going to work out, and knowing that He wants to use me right now in the lives of those around me as an encourager and friend.  There is so much freedom in this.  I am free to live in the moment...without stressing about how it all will work out...knowing that He cares so much about me that He willingly takes on the role of Provider, Protector, Friend, and so much more.  He fills me to overflowing with His peace and joy, truly helping me to live in the moment.  I am so much more aware of the little blessings found in the everyday.  And life is so much less stressful.
But, this truly is a daily choice.  I choose to let Him have all the details.  I have no clue what my future holds, but I truly know the One who holds my future!  And He has a much better plan for me...one that will grow and utilize the God-given potential that He has put deep inside of me!
I am living a dream life... in that this life is absolutely nothing that I would have imagined for myself and yet He has made it so much fuller that I ever knew was possible.  I have given Him free rein to do whatever He wants to do with my life, and enjoying each blessing and outpouring of love that He sends my way.  He has picked out friends for me that I would never have met if He hadn't arranged the meeting.  I am able to share my struggles with others and truly know how it feels to experience what they might be going through.  And I have come to the other side, where He is cultivating my happiness and giving me a purpose and reason to get up every day!  My life is not perfect by any means, but it is mine, and He is present in it!  Love it!
Thank You, God, for seeing the potential in me and using me as You see fit.  Thank You for redeeming my life story, helping me to give You the control, and helping me sit back and enjoy the ride as You write my life story that is so perfectly tailored to who You have made me to be.  I am in awe of You and all You are doing in and around me.  Thank You, thank You, thank You!

Because it's for my brother!

This picture was taken at my brother's last bday party, a year ago, by one of my sisters.
I pitched for an hour and a half so that every guest that came and wanted to hit for awhile had a chance.  I think each person was the batter until they got tired.  Anyways, it ended with a line drive straight at my chest, obviously I had no glove on, and I put my right hand up to block the ball...which resulted in smashed nerves and a hand that didn't work correctly for about a month.  But it was for my brother...and worth it.
This year, I knew I didn't want a repeat, so some friends of mine let me practice pitching and catching a softball with a borrowed glove (oh, guess I forgot to mention that last year's party was my first experience with a softball...growing up I pitched to my brother for hours every day using a tennis ball which I would just catch with my bare hand).  Anyways, I practiced ahead of time so I could be ready...and looked forward to helping him celebrate this year...it was his 30th bday yesterday! 
But...last night I went roller skating with a friend and her son...and had a blast!  However, one of the guys from our local men's roller derby team works there...and he was wanting to get some blocking practice in.  So, who better to block into the walls then the team's wanna-be-photographer.  After all, she's watched and taken pics, so that means she's fair game?  Needless to say, I spent much of the two hours last night being shoved into the walls.  One of the times I must have jammed my middle finger...
...you know where this is going, right?
Yep...I showed up for my brother's bday party today with two fingers buddy taped together...on my pitching arm.  And still warmed up with my brother.  And then proceeded to pitch for two hours straight so that everyone could hit.  AND caught some insane throws and hits with my gloved, left hand.  Some of the throws by my brother in law Matt were insanely hard and I have a beautiful bruise on the inner ring finger.  But I pitched almost as many good pitches as bad pitches and everyone had a blast.  I had to make myself stop at the two hour mark though.  And when I took the glove off my left hand, I couldn't even bend my fingers at first.
And I had to field all kinds of questions about my fingers...the assumption was that I had hurt myself again pitching...or that I was crazy for pitching again and should wrap myself in bubble wrap (oh, to have a dollar for every time that joke has been aimed at me!).
But it all boils down to this...my brother and I share a history full of me pitching and him hitting/catching.  From as soon as he was old enough to catch the first tennis ball and swing the first plastic bat.  I could have a cast on, and I would still figure out a way to pitch for his birthday...because it's for my brother!
Happy 30th birthday, Tim!  I love you and I am so proud of the man, husband, and uncle that you have become!  I couldn't ask for a better brother!

Being creative, and a little ornery...

     I had the incredible privilege of planning and hosting the birthday party of one of my best friends last weekend.  Since I was still in the middle of the 30 day challenge, I didn't get to share.  So, in order to keep my blogging momentum going, you guys get to see pics and hear all about it.  I discovered along the way, that I really, really enjoy planning parties/events for my friends, and having complete freedom to do whatever I want.  I was literally told I could plan whatever I wanted.  So I scheduled a Facebook event telling people to meet us at the skating rink on the evening of his actual birthday, and flew with it.
     One of the first things that I did was to contact his little sister on facebook, and check with some buddies from the skating rink about doing a slideshow.  They have a projector that puts the pictures up on the far wall of the skating rink, and you end up with pictures that are taller than real life.  For a month, his family and I worked on gathering pictures up and putting them together for his slide show (and this part actually got to be something he didn't know about, and I didn't mess up and tell him.
     He was supposed to get the surprise of his sister, her kiddos, and his mom showing up for his party.  However, the week before the party, I screwed it all up by sending him a text about it that was supposed to go to my other best friend who was also helping me behind the scenes.  I am NOT good with surprises/secrets, especially when I am super excited about the person's reaction to it.  So, I messed up that surprise.
     But his little sister, my other best friend, and I worked on another part of the party, that I managed not to give away, too.  And that is the t-shirt he is wearing in the second picture.  His sister drew the tumbling/rolling stick figures for me, and I was able to take them and photoshop his own head, wearing his horn helmet (Heather's brilliant idea), onto the stick figures.  (I think I forgot to mention that he is a member of KC's own Cowtown Butchers Men's Roller Derby).  Then after photoshopping everything, typing out the phrase "that's just how I roll", and getting the thumbs up from his sister, I printed it all off on an iron-on transfer sheet.  Once it was all situated on the shirt, it was ironed on, the paper backing was pulled off, and I have to admit I was really proud of how it turned out.  At the party (he requested no presents and no cards), we had different colored permanent markers, and everyone was able to sign his shirt.  I wish I had a picture to show you the expression on his face when I told him that his sister drew the design that was on his shirt!  Priceless!
     The day of the party found me in the kitchen making a humongous mess.  The cake was shaped and stacked on top of a rice krispie foundation, with french vanilla and milk chocolate layers.  The wheels were aluminum foil covered circle rice krispie treats.  The biggest mess I made was making the icing, where I shot powdered sugar all over the counter top and myself.  But even I was impressed with the end result...a 3-d roller skate cake that was super heavy.  In the above picture, we had made him close his eyes and I handed him the cake.  He knew that I was working on a cake, but he did not expect that...or the weight of it.  He commented later wondering why it was so heavy.  Hmmm...let's see...four inches of rice krispies covered in six layers of cake at the tallest part.  And bigger than an actual skate.  Yep...that equals pretty darn heavy.  The best part (and I don't even normally eat cake) it actually tasted better than it looked!
     At the skating rink, we had a great turnout.  Even of his friends that didn't want to skate but just came and hung out with us all.  Our group had about 24 people I believe, and we were surrounded by teens of every age (it was technically teen night at the rink b/c it was a Friday night).  We held our own though, and no one got hurt.  The slideshow took awhile to actually play due to technical difficulties, but that didn't stop everyone from enjoying the pictures.  We all came to a complete stop at the end of the rink to watch it, and didn't even cause a traffic jam or complaints.
     After skating, we took a great group photo in the lobby and then headed to my house for the bonfire after party (although we missed one of his friend's and the three other people he had brought with him in the pic).  My road was full of cars for my house, for once, and my backyard and trampoline were full of laughter and conversation.  Just the way I love it.  Some of the people with kiddos headed home after the bonfire goodies...smores and hot dogs of course...and we moved into the living room for the after after party.  I never get tired of random conversation and laughter...and love to have a houseful of people!  The party didn't stop until just after one o'clock in the morning and then everyone crashed for the night.
     I think the part that was the most fun, out of the whole thing, was being able to do something special for someone who is always doing things for others.  We are talking a guy who sometimes overbooks himself because if its something that he can help with, he is going to help. (after meeting his little sister and his mom, I think that this probably runs in the family...amazing family with huge hearts and a love for God that shines!)  There are so many people that appreciate the many things that he willingly does for them, and the turnout that he had at the party was a good reflection of that.
     It was a crazy busy week/weekend...but in the end I just remember thinking how blessed I am to have such amazing friends, and the opportunity now to do something like this.  I am also so thankful for the creativity that God filled me with, and the pure joy that being creative gives me.  I, too, am one of the people who is blessed to have this friend in my life, and benefit from his willingness to help out.  I hope that this year is one of his all-time favorites and hope we were able to show him how much he means to us all.
     I think I could keep going...because this barely touches on the weekend...but will cut myself off for today!

30 Things, Day 30...remembered for...

30. List 10 things you would hope to be remembered for.

First of all, I just have to say that I have really enjoyed having thirty days in a row worth of blog entries...and having a topic to talk about.  They have not all been easy things to talk about or figure out, but I have put a lot of me out there in the last thirty days.  Wonder what I am going to do for the next ones...
I have enjoyed exploring the answers to these questions, and it has helped me to see how far I have come and all the healing God has been doing in my life!  Love that!

    I want to be remembered as a woman who lived her life completely for God, sold out for Him and relying completely on Him (1).  As someone who made the best of all circumstances and chose to praise God in the storm, being thankful in all things (2).  As a mother who put her children first (after God, and possible future husband), encouraged them in all their adventures, and enjoyed watching them live their own lives for God (3).  I want to be remembered as a person who was a good friend, an encourager, someone willing to come alongside those around me and lift them up (4).  I would love to be remembered as a prayer warrior, who people knew would pray for them, even if they didn't ask for it (5).  I wouldn't have any trouble being remembered for the bonfires, parties, and celebrations I have hosted...but mainly want the good memories made at those to be remembered more than the person behind the scenes (6).  While I don't particularly think we need to remember my laugh, I would love to be remembered as the person who loved to make those around her laugh, and joined in the fun herself (7).  Every once in awhile I have some fairly good insights, mostly learned from what God has been teaching me, and I wouldn't mind being remembered for my willingness to share my own struggles in order to help others out...knowing that I really do know what that feels like (8).  I wouldn't mind being remembered for the things that I have been able to make in my lifetime, and the pictures that I so enjoy taking (9).  How about being remembered as the gal who truly believed that she could do all things through Christ who gives her strength...maybe the reason that I have tried so many different crafty things is truly due to the idea my mom instilled in me that I can do anything that I set my mind to, coupled with Phillippians 4:13 (10).
     I don't need to be remembered for my GPA, or based on how popular I was, or whether or not I ever was famous.  I don't want to be remembered for all the times that I failed both myself and others in my lifetime, or the times that I wandered off the path God had for me.  In all reality, it wouldn't hurt my feelings if I wasn't remembered at all.  However, I want my life to shine God's love to all those around me, to be a testament of Him.  I want Him to be remembered even after I am long gone...hopefully passed down the generations of my family.  I want my life to be a reminder that God can do amazing things when we just give Him the pen and allow Him to write our life story.  That He can redeem even the most broken life and turn it into one that is fulfilled and whole and useful for Him.
     I am at a point in my life where I am loving what He is doing in me and around me.  I am able to see great strides that I have made with Him, and many difficulties that we have overcome together.  There is AMAZING power found in prayer and in living hand-in-hand with our Lord and Savior!  I don't even want to imagine this life without Him.  I have it made WITH Him.  And I am eternally grateful that He chose me to be His daughter!
     Thank you for taking this journey with me over the last 30 days, and for taking the time to read what I have put out there.  If you missed any of the days, this is the link for the beginning, which has every day linked to it.  Feel free to get to know me better!
I hope that you have a very blessed day and that each one you are given is used to get to know God more.

30 Things, Day 29...misunderstand

29. What do you think people misunderstand most about you?
     It's the same thing, again, that used to get questioned when I was in college the first time.  I can be very energetic and happy when I am around other Christians, especially those I know well and am comfortable around.  This is sometimes hard for others to understand or deal with.  My very first BSU director didn't quite know what to do with me, and I rubbed him the wrong way at first.  My second BSU director put me on the leadership team and channeled that energy into being a greeter and making sure that everyone was welcomed, as well as leading the worship part of the meetings.  And then, after hearing so many comments from other people that didn't know how to take me (don't get me wrong, I can be incredibly serious, too, not just a fun hyper side), I kind of lost it along the way.  After the divorce, as God began to heal me from the inside out, this side of me came back.  Sometimes it shows up as contagious giggles, or playing around with the kids of the group, or cartwheels, or trying to make my friends laugh.  It is more tempered now...it doesn't come out quite as much.  But as I accept and embrace this life that God has given me, the joy just spills out. 
I don't really apologize for it anymore. Mostly because my kids are just now getting to discover this side of me, and they deserve to see the difference!  But also because it is the way God made me, and it is one of the ways that I can show Him my appreciation for all that He has brought me through and is doing in me.  Why wouldn't I want to overflow with joy?  And the people who know me and love me are more than willing to accept me as I am and love me anyway.  Despite my sometimes over exuberance for life!  They know all the sides of me, and make the choice to stick around anyways...and I absolutely adore them for it!
I may have a love for life and ability to cut loose and have fun that not everyone understands.  But its part of who God made me to be.  And when it is time to be serious...I know how to do that too!

30 Things, Day 28...love language

28. What is your love language?
     I think I have always been a tie between "quality time" and "gifts".  Making time for me, and coming up with reasons/ideas of ways to spend time with me speak loudly to the very depths of me.  Coming home from work early, just to surprise me (which didn't happen often, but when it did was a big deal to me) was one of my favorites.  On the flip side of that, it was always hurtful, even when I tried not to let it be, if no time was made.  I can be a very understanding, patient person, and even make all kinds of excuses for others to keep from being hurt by them or misunderstanding them...but it is hard for me to understand why someone would purposefully stay away, or work hours they didn't have to work, rather than carving out time to spend with me.  I am learning that it isn't supposed to be that way, and there has been some damage done by the experiences I have had in the past.  But it makes me all that much more appreciative when people do give of their time to be with the girls and I...and especially thankful for all the time that God willingly spends with me.  He never complains and He never treats me like I am an inconvenience.  He is always there and willing to spend as much time with me as I want.
     Gifts are a big deal to me, too.  For instance, bringing a Cherry Coke or a bag of Skittles when coming to see me.  I don't think anyone understands the volumes that speaks to my heart.  To me, it is like saying..."not only did I want to come and see you, I was already thinking of you before I came".  For some people this one comes naturally, and for others it takes a little thought and planning ahead.  But wow!  Even the smallest little item can truly bless this little gal's heart.
     And, when you combine the two!  When someone makes time out of their crazy schedule to spend with me, talking to me and listening, and adds on top of it some kind of gift...the blessing that that does for my heart can last me for weeks!
     Okay, indulge my wandering mind for a second.  Just had a total "bean thought".  The blogging that I have done over the last 28 days sure would make things a lot easier on whatever man God has for my future.  Today's post could be totally enlightening/eye opening.  It's almost like coming with an instruction manual.  (Only thing is, I can't imagine a guy wanting to know enough about me that he would sit down and read my blog... )

30 Things, Day 27...favorite...

27. What is your favorite part of your body and why?
Yes, there are two pictures up there...which is amazing...because I am normally my own worst critic and I thought this one would be a struggle for me.  But I am in a stage right now where I actually like some things about myself!  I know, miracles still happen!  I love my hair when it is straight, and when my sister has it looking so good!  The color in this picture rocks!  The other picture is my right ankle...I actually like the way my legs look now that I am working out!  The trampoline rocks for making your legs defined, by the way!

30 Things, Day 26...notion the world has wrong

26. What popular notion do you think the world has most wrong?

This one is an easy one for me!  (which is nice considering the last few have not been)
The notion that I think the world most has wrong is the idea that you have to be weak to trust in God.  There actually is not much that is easy about trusting in something you cannot see.  However, He has proven over and over again to me, that He is real; that He wants a relationship with me; that He is willing to do whatever it takes in order to show me how very much He loves and cares about me; that He is more than willing to walk every bump and crater of this road with me; among many many more things that He has willingly revealed to me.  There is no one like our God.  And I cannot imagine trying to do this life without Him.
You are NOT weak for choosing to believe in the One, True God.  It takes amazing willpower and strength to walk with Him.  And He is more than willing to give you the strength and wisdom to do just that.  Belief is a powerful thing!

30 Things, Day 25...dinner

25. If you could have dinner with anyone in history, who would it be and what would you eat?

Maybe you need to be hungry to write this one?
Honestly, I just came off of an amazing bonfire last night, after a very fun birthday party, put together in honor of my best friend's birthday.  I can't imagine having a more enjoyable "dinner" then the one we had at 10 o'clock last night in my own backyard.  I was surrounded by people who love and support my best friend, who have a crazy love for the Lord, and who try to live their life in a way that honors Him.  What more could a girl ask for?  Hot dogs, smores, birthday cake, and various other goodies never tasted so good!
I know the point of this question is probably more geared around gaining wisdom from a powerful celebrity or public figure, or well known public servant such as Mother Teresa. 
But for me...in the sheer exhaustion of a Saturday night...coming down from the adrenaline that kept me going for the last four days...all I can think of is that I have amazing friends and eating with them, celebrating with them, beats all.  The fun, laughter, good food, warm fire, and ability to bless a friend who does so much for so many...truly takes the cake!
Speaking of cake...pretty proud of this one despite the fact the color did not come out the way we hoped...

30 Things, Day 24...family dynamic

24. Describe your family dynamic of your childhood vs. your family dynamic now.
I grew up in a household with four sisters and one brother, a stay-at-home mom and a dad who worked outside the house and built computers at home in his basement in the evenings.
As you can imagine there were often squabbles.
I now have my own little family...just me, and two precocious girls.
As you can imagine, there are often squabbles.
However, we are incredibly blessed to live in the same city as four of the five siblings.  We don't get together all that often, and because we are all human...there are still misunderstandings... but they are mine.  Built in friends who share some history with me and have all kinds of stories on me, and opinions of me.
It is a blessing, because God picked us for each other.  And through thick or thin, big arguments or little, loads of laughter and sometimes tears, they are blood...they are mine.
After all, how many of us can actually say they grew up surrounded by five siblings!

30 Things, Day 23...hobbies

23. List your top 5 hobbies and why you love them.

1) Reading.  But I limit myself to Christian fiction/non-fiction.  I do not enjoy reading cuss words or steamy romances.  However, if it encourages me in my walk with God, then it is all that much more enjoyable to me.  I love to lose myself in a good book!
2) Quilting.  Any type of sewing is fun, but I absolutely love to take a pile of cloth, that doesn't even always look like it should go together, and make it into a beautiful piece of art that is useful and brings comfort/joy to the person using it.  The above quilts were made for my pastor's wife and daughter (from the church back home in Jeff City, to welcome them to MO).  I love giving them away almost as much as creating and sewing them.
3) Taking pictures.  Sometimes this is my favorite for the same reason...love to be able to take pictures of the people I care about, or a sport that I enjoy, and hear the reactions when other people see/enjoy them.  I have fun in the whole process...taking the pictures, editing the pictures, (not always in the uploading process, though), and hearing the comments or seeing them use my pictures as their facebook profile pic, or putting it in print in the paper.
4)  Making others laugh...this is more than a hobby for me, its more like a life goal.  I love everything about laughter and believe that it has healing tendencies!  I get so much enjoyment out of being part of group laughter, or being the cause of it.  And the full belly chuckles are my favorite!
5)  Prayer.  I have begun to make prayer a habit and there is nothing more powerful to me, or no greater privilege then being able to pray for others!

30 Things, Day 22...5, 10, 15

22. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10 years? 15 years?

Well, what a question to get today.  See, today is my 35th birthday.  So add those years, and we are talking some big birthdays...40, 50, and 55.
All I know for sure, is that by my 40th birthday I will finally be a college graduate that has her bachelor's degree.  That's it.
You see, my future and every single detail of it, is in God's hands.  I rest in the knowledge that He is holding the pen of my life story, and that He has great plans for my future.
When I was at Northwest Missouri State University (14 years ago), and "dating" God the first time around (I am in my second go round of this right now), God gave me my life verse and has brought it to mind on an almost daily basis here lately.  The verse is...
     "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.  You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.  I will be found by you,” declares the LORD...  Jeremiah 29:11-14a
I don't even know for sure what He is going to use my degree for.  But that is perfectly okay with me.  Because I have the promise that it will be for my best...that I can rest in Him, full of expectant hope.
So, in 5 years, when I turn 40...I hope that you will be able to look at my life and see a woman who is continuing to grow in God, seek God, and live for Him in any and every way possible...every single day.  That she has an even stronger relationship with God then, then she does today.
When I hit 50, I hope that even my daughters will begin to see the strength of God in me and respect that and want a relationship with God like I have been forming, and will still be forming.
At 55, I would love to see my daughter's married to men who live sold out for God, who can serve God right alongside their men.  And that I would still be content in God, living completely for Him, coming to Him with absolutely everything and supporting my girls in their adventures in life.
Everything else will merely be a bonus and blessing! 
As long as my relationship with God is growing, maturing, stretching, etc...everything is as it should be.
My future, and all of me, is in His hands to do with as He pleases!

30 Things, Day 21...superpower

21. If you could have one superpower, what would it be and what would you do with it first?

If I could have any superpower out there...the first one that pops in my head is the ability to fly...but that seems selfish, because I just want to fly.  In reality I think the superpower I would most love to have is the ability to heal and/or cheer someone up with a hug or a touch.  And the first thing I would do is hug Betsy's dad, and heal him from the MS that is taking away his ability to live a full life and function on his own.  Then I would go to Tennessee and I would hug Wandamom and her husband.  And I would just keep going around to the people I love, hugging them and freeing them up from the diseases their bodies are fighting against.  Then people I don't know.  You get the point.
But, since I don't have that superpower, I choose to tap into the superpower that I DO possess, and that is prayer.  I will just keep praying that God will do His will in the lives of those who are dealing with hard things and diseases that change their ability to fully function on this side of heaven....looking forward to the day that we all are in Heaven and they no longer have to deal with any of this life's hard things!

30 Things, Day 20...childhood memories

me at 9 months

 

20. Describe 3 significant memories from your childhood.

 

This is totally appropriate for this week, seeing as I have a birthday in a few days.  Looking back is oftentimes a fun way to see how far you have come, and also helpful to see what areas you might need to work on.  

I have had a few concussions in my lifetime, and each one seems to have knocked out some more childhood memories...but I still have some, although I can't say that they are significant.

 

1)  My dad made me a wooden rocking horse that I absolutely loved.  It was the size of a small pony, painted brown, large enough for two of us to sit on at once, but mine.  Mom had put button eyes on it, and a yarn tail and mane, and the smile was painted on.  I cherished this horse that my dad made, and it lived in the basement of our split level house, by the laundry room.  I visited it regularly and shared hours of pretend time with it.  I don't remember how its head fell off, but I still very much remember that the nails were still sticking out that had used to hold the head in place.  I was playing circus performer, and was standing up on the rocking horse.  I doubt anyone was even aware that I was down there with my horse, I imagine I had been told to stay away from it until dad had a chance to fix it.  As y'all have probably figured out by now, knowing how accident prone I can be, I fell forward, from my standing position on top of the horse, and put one of the nails into the palm of my left hand.  I may have hurt myself in other ways as I fell, I don't remember that part.  I am sure my mom came running.  And it must have been fairly deep, because I still have a jagged little red circle, to this day, where the nail tore through the skin.  Unfortunately, in the move after the divorce, the horse (who was sitting in the garage waiting for me to remember to take him to my dad's so that his broken leg and missing slats could be fixed) was tossed by well-meaning moving helpers and when I first realized that he didn't make the move with us, I was crushed.  It always was one of my prized possessions, and made every single move with me (other than the dorm room ones).

2)  My dad also made me my own room, at the same tri-level house.  It was the only room I had as a kid that I didn't have to share with anyone.  My older sister and I both had rooms that dad finished for us in the rec room level of that house.  They were real rooms, and he did an amazing job making them perfect for us.  Solid walls, doors, painted in our favorite colors, with outlets and everything.  ( I go into all that detail, because later, in order to get my own room, he put up a temporary wall for me in the next house, and I had no door and no added outlets).  My room was purple and I loved it!  I had my own little window looking out into the front yard.  And I could close the door on all the "babies" (my siblings ranged from four years younger than me to ten years younger) and feel like a big girl.  I think I was all of 10 or 11...but you know...big girl.

3)  In fifth grade, we moved...and I went from knowing almost everyone in my grade to no one.  I struggled to fit in, and they were a pretty close knit group.  My journal from that time is full of low moods and a deep desire to make friends.  The struggles that I had back then have tainted my perception of moving during the elementary school years, to the point that I hated doing it to my own girls and try to make sure that at the very least it does not happen in the middle of the school year.  My kiddos seem to bounce back a lot easier then I did tho.

Well, there are three childhood memories...probably the ones that are easiest for me to remember, too.  My siblings have so many stories on me, but I don't remember most of them.  Maybe that is for the best.  Who knows.  I imagine I probably was quite an ornery kid!

30 Things, Day 19...live

19. If you could live anywhere, where would it be and why?

Some of these are super hard for me to answer.  I have seriously never pondered this one because of the fact that I love to be by family (and they live here), and now that I am a single parent, there is even less option for leaving this state.
So, again, I will approach this question from my own angle.
I currently live in a rental house...that pretty much anything that has been fixed up, has been done by me in the two years I have been here...and there is a lot that needs to be done.  However, it is like flushing money down the drain, b/c its not my house.
That being said...if I could live anywhere, it would be in my own house, that I own, that I could fix up for us...not for someone else.  I would love to own a house like the one above that is full of character.  In a good neighborhood where we could feel safe, with a fenced backyard for the dogs to run around in.  Someday, I would even like the big front porch, the nice deck in the back that I could entertain from and do my quiet time from the swing.  With a white picket fence.
But most importantly, I want to be right where God wants me to be.  And right now, that is here...in this rental house, in this city, in this state.  So I am right where I want to be... for now.

30 Thing, Day 18...forgive

18. What has been the most difficult thing you have had to forgive?
I think y'all already know the answer to this question.  Maybe not to the extreme degree that I had to keep forgiving, as more things were revealed, but you know.
So rather than go into that whole story again, I would rather just talk about the healing that came after I asked God to help me forgive it all.  And it was a process that God and went through daily for awhile, especially after new details came up.  But once I began to forgive, and allowed God to foster growth in this area of my life, things honestly began to change for the better...for me, at least.  I was able to pull closer to God and not have anything standing in the way of my relationship with Him.  And once I began to forgive, the other things were a little easier.
The key, though, for me was that I started praying for the person that I was trying to forgive.  And you can't become bitter towards someone who you are praying for...especially if you are praying for them on a daily basis.  And I desperately did not want to become bitter.
Making the conscious choice to forgive...which was a conscious decision that I stubbornly stuck with until it just became more natural...was probably the best thing that I did at that time.
God doesn't want us to be stuck in our junk...or to drag our past behind us.  He wants to heal us and help us to move forward.  And He has forgiven each of us of so very much, how can we withhold forgiveness from others?

30 Things, Day 17...good at

17. What is the thing you most wish you were great at?

This one is easy for me.  There are a lot of things that I wish I were great at, rather than just able to dabble at.  The biggest one...
     I wish I were a great mother who instinctively would always know exactly what was underlying each outburst, as well as exactly what needed to be done to help them work it through.  I wish I were a mom who never lost her temper or ever hollered at her girls.  Who greeted them with snacks and a calmness when they walked in the door, every day after school.  Etc, etc, etc.
     Now, I am realistic enough to know that this side of heaven, that is not entirely possible...but a great goal.  There are some times when they come home, and seem upset about everything, that I wish I had had some specific psychology class to help with deciphering it.  But, I am almost done with my psych classes, and that has not been covered.  I am so thankful that God knows it all, and He is willing to share His wisdom with me, and that He is helping me to keep a lid on the temper.  If I am stressed out, it comes out a little too much, but it is getting better.  I think all those years of squashing any emotions, kind of made it explode out for awhile, but there is a lot of improvement that has been done!

Other things that I would love to be great at...
...always thought it would be fun to be the lead singer in a band.
...would love to be an expert photographer and have every photo come out the way I saw it in my mind.
...rather than just playing with many, many different kinds of crafting, maybe it would be fun to be an expert and excel at just one or two of them...like sewing, painting, drawing, cake making, etc.  I've done a little bit of everything but wouldn't consider myself great at any of them...

30 Things, Day 16...accomplishments

16. What are your 5 greatest accomplishments?

I have to get my mommy on the phone for this one...literally.  I have no clue where to even start.  I am a single, stay at home mom...who God is having to build up to be able to see herself the way that He does...and I am far from being able to do just that, yet.  For me to sit down and try to figure out if I have any greatest accomplishments, let alone five, seems more daunting then shoving a semester's worth of Abnormal Psychology into five weeks!  I don't really feel as if I "do" that much.
1)  I know that I have said this before...but coming to the end of me, and realizing how desperately I needed a living relationship with God has to be one of the best things that I have ever done in my life.  There just isn't anything that compares to the fullness of life available in Him, and the things that I can do WITH Him are limitless!
2)  My girls.  One of my greatest accomplishments... investing time into them on a daily basis, helping them to reach towards their potential, holding them as they throw fits trying to figure out their own emotions, being the mother that they need me to be in order to foster healing in their lives, providing an environment for them to thrive in and continually move forward.  Being their mother is one of the best things that I could possibly ever do in this lifetime.
3)  Going back to college...and continually working at it...carving time out of the week to give it my best, rather than my worst.  I just finished what is considered my first academic year at Ashford University, 8 classes...a whole semester of class shoved into a five week session.  Eight straight A's.  This is something that I have never done before...and I have more responsibilities now then I did when I was in college the first time, just as many distractions, and single.  Going back to college is huge, in and of itself, even more so with all the responsibilities that come along with being a single mom.  It is a privilege to be getting this close to graduation, and the party to celebrate that will be the biggest one I have ever thrown/gone to!  I am so thankful that God told me to go back, put all the details into place, and gives me the strength and wisdom to succeed at this one.  It means the world to me and I cannot wait to hold that diploma in my hand!
4)  My mother told me that one of my biggest achievements is my ability to overcome adversity.  She was telling me, from her point of view, that sometimes all the crazy things being thrown my way, that I overcame with God's help, were enough to make her want to run and hide.  In the midst of the hard times, it really didn't feel as if I was achieving anything; it just felt like I was clinging to God and fighting for my very existence.  But looking back, God and I--we truly have overcome a lot!
5)  This one goes hand in hand with number four, and has been mentioned over the last 16 days before.  And it is one that can sometimes be a daily struggle for me.  After the divorce, I gained an oversensitive "flight response" to drama from others or feeling as if I had overstepped my place in friendships, or if a friendship felt like it possibly might be more work then it was worth to fumble around and get back to a good place.  However, that being said, God has been growing in me a strong desire to stick with it, to choose not to walk away when it feels like work, to ignore the comments from others that He does not support.  One of my best friends and I were talking about friendship through texts yesterday.  I sent one that said something to the effect of...is a true friend the one that just settles in, digs their feet in, and says even though this seems as if it is too much work, I choose to work for the relationship.  She sent back a text that said something to the effect of... good friends sometimes choose to walk away, the ones that choose to stay are best friends.  I think its the friendships that survive the insane ups and downs together, that are even more rare then best friends...they are the friendships that you don't get very many of in one lifetime...where you work through really hard things together and it just makes the bond tighter and more precious.  I have had three or four of those kinds of friendships in my lifetime and they are precious to me.  And they help me to practice not running.

30 Things, Day 15...animal

15. If you were an animal, what would you be and why?

This question is one that seems to get asked a lot in "get to know you" settings...but I have never understood the point of it.  But, if I had to pick one animal to be...I guess it would be an eagle, so that I could soar in the sky.  I have always thought it would be nice to be able to just fly whenever I wanted to and see the world from above...

But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.
Isaiah 40:30-31

30 Things, Day 14...strengths

14. Describe 5 strengths you have.

I have to tell you, this one was super hard for me.  While traveling home from Sioux City this weekend, I was talking this over with my best friend Heather.  Because, I am not personally able to see this in myself the way that I can in others.
Partly due to my struggles to see or admit or whatever you wanna call it, I am going to word it this way...here are five things that God has been building up in me, shining His strength through some really tough life events.
1)  The ability to hand it all over to Him and let Him work out all the details...waiting on Him, especially for three big things that I would love to see happen in my life.  I am learning this one, and it is evident in the absence of stressing out over the details, and the presence of His peace that surpasses all understanding, and reminders that He has it covered.  I have learned to stop trying to make it happen myself, and to rest in Him, that it will all happen according to His perfect plan for me.
2)  Hope.  Which goes hand in hand with the first.  I have great hope for my future, knowing that He has some great things up His "sleeve" for me.  And this hope that I have in Him is never-ending.  And makes me contagious for Him.
3)  Tenacity, or the refusal to give up.  God has taught me that I can keep going, no matter what is happening around me, because He is right there holding my hand, seeing me through.  With reassurance like that, things just don't seem as scary anymore.
4)  The ability to see/look for the positives and to be thankful in all things.  This is something that God is growing in me daily, and something for which I am incredibly thankful.  It has changed my life and my outlook.  I love that He can show me even the smallest good thing among some really hard things, so that it just doesn't seem as bleak.  Or when the three of us are down, to come up with a small list of things that we appreciate, and then our mood seems to switch around.  There is so much power in being able to see the good among the bad...and its like taking the control away from satan...switching the focus back to God and all the things He has done for me.
5)  Encouragement.  Because of all the things that God has done for me, and the desire He planted in me to use my hard times to help others in their hard times, He is able to use me to encourage others again.  It was one of the things that I most missed in my desert times...and I am so glad that He can use me to be an encourager to others again.  I would love to be contagious for Him, lifting others up, and walking this sometimes hard road beside them.

30 Things, Day 13...weaknesses

13. Describe 5 weaknesses you have.

     When you look super close at my life, like the above picture, its not a pretty sight.  It is full of fumbling around, messing up, and having to daily go back to God to be built back up.  I struggle.  There are things in my life that are really hard to give to God and leave in His hands.  Walking in obedience does not come naturally to me, I tend to balk and have to remind myself of why I am choosing to let Him lead.  My favorite part of this walk with God, is that He shines His strength through my weaknesses, and together we make a really great team!
      One of my biggest weaknesses is my struggle to trust.  I have trouble trusting fully that God is Who He says He is, and is willing to do all that He says He is.  Beyond that, I have been wounded, and it is especially hard for me to trust men.  I am learning, and God is reprograming this part of me, that not all men are untrustworthy or going to hurt me. (but, yes, there are ones I should just stay away from).  As I grow, and get daily rebuilt spending time with God, the fear of men is lessening, and He is opening my eyes to safe guys that He has put into my life to show me that they exist.  And He is more than willing to consistently reassure me that He is never going to change or leave me.
     Another weakness, is I tend to want things now.  Waiting is not something that comes easily to me.  And this is something God has been repeatedly working with me on.  Because, in reality, the best things in life are the very ones that are more than worth waiting on/for.  And God keeps telling me that it will be more than worth the wait.
     Yet another, control.  It is hard for me to not feel as if I have at least a little bit of control.  However, I want God to have full control.  He has shown me that I can fully trust Him, wait on Him, and let Him hold the pen that writes my life story...and that when I combine those three things...putting it truly in His hands...He will make my life more full and fun then it has ever been.  And He also taught me that I have control...over the way I choose to react to things...and that is the control I need to use and enjoy.
     Overthinking things.  It is a natural tendency that I am unlearning right now, too.  I am so scared of hurting other people, or stepping on toes, or of taking teasing too far, that I tend to get myself all anxious thinking that I have done something wrong.  I am proud to say, that due to God's ever-present help and work in this area it is not near as bad as it once was, but it is still a work in progress.  One of the things that God has done to help me in this area, is to give me friends that call me out on it when they see me doing it, and also friends that are more laid back and not so preoccupied with it.  Their examples are rubbing off on me in a good way.  But I still catch myself stewing and overthinking, and have to just stop and hand it over to God.
     My mouth.  Another area that tends to get away from me, and is partially to blame for the weakness of overthinking.  I don't always think before I speak, although I have improved in this area too.  There are times that I wish I could erase a comment just made, especially when it just did not come out right.  God is helping me with this area, too!
     All in all, I am a work-in-progress.  He is not finished with me yet, thankfully!  I won't ever be perfect, until the day I join Him in Heaven.  But, He loves me anyways...so much so that He died on the cross for my sins, to make the way for me to be able to build a close relationship with Him.  And I am forever grateful for that and the work that He is doing in me!

30 Things, Day 12...typical day

12.  Describe a typical day in your current life.

I chose to describe a weekday...because there is nothing typical about my weekends.
I am a college student, again, and a single mom...so, let's say Tuesday...this is what Tuesday looks like for me:

8:00 AM...alarm clock goes off, and I hit the snooze...and repeat this every four minutes or so (it doesn't always go off at the same increments, b/c its snooze button has to work too much)...for a total of 30-40 minutes.
Get out of bed and let the dogs out...which means I have to carry one of them down the stairs.
Put food and water in their bowls.
Brush teeth...and other morning "chores" including getting dressed somewhere in there...pop the top of a Cherry Coke.
Holler to my oldest that we need to walk out the door in five minutes.
Bring dogs in.
Listen to youngest complain about her shoes, or clothes, or something (the two of us are NOT morning people, unlike her older sister)
Put the dogs in the kennel and rush the girls out the door
Drop the kids off at school.
Come home and shower/exercise/spend time on facebook for about an hour
Settle into my recliner with the week's chapters in the textbook
Somewhere in here I get hungry, get off the recliner, let the dogs out/back in, and grab something to eat.
Go back to reading...with texts scattered throughout the day (and it breaks up the monotony!)
Between chapters I try to take a break...which normally is jumping on the trampoline
Keep reading (honestly...this is a Tuesday for me...hows this for a fun read?)
Then the alarm on my phone goes off to remind me to pick up the girls...and I sometimes would not remember or realize it was already that late if it weren't for the alarm.  I hit the snooze.  It gives me five more minutes.
Round the dogs up and get them in the kennel...and every day I actually say to them "I'm gonna go get the girls, be back in a little bit"
Wait in the pickup line for the girls, and read something for fun...or just text
Get the girls in the car
T works on homework at the table, H keeps talking to her...the squabble...I break up fights and remind H that she needs to be quiet during homework time.  Normally, I am still working on my own chapters.
Sometimes H and I play Just Dance Country on the Wii.
Then its time to go skating...and we pick something up to eat on the way there.
Then come home and put the kids to bed, and I do my quiet time.
And then crash for the night so that I can hit the snooze again in the morning and start all over again!

30 Things, Day 11...pet peeves

11.  Describe ten pet peeves that you have.

Love the fact that this one actually took a lot of thought...
Hopefully that is proof that God has been working in me to help me focus more on the positives then the negatives!

1)  When someone reaches over to grab food off of the person's plate next to them...and they don't even know that person.
2)  When guys leave the toilet seat up (of course, this one makes me that much more appreciative of the ones that put the seat and lid down!  Especially with dogs in the house!)
3) Trash left lying around for someone else to have to pick out, or when people throw their fast food bag of trash out the car window.
4)  Cell phones going off in church, movies, etc.  (especially in the bathroom stall)
...
I just can't come up with ten...don't have it...
And after that, it feels like I was complaining and it honestly makes me want to come up with at least that many things that I am thankful for!
1) bonfires
2) laughing with friends after a hard week...slaphappy laughing where you laugh at yourself for laughing in the first place
3) children that surprise you by not being frustrated at you when plans just don't work out
4) having something on the weekend that you look forward to all week long.

Maybe you could come up with a list of ten things that are pet peeves of yours...but I just didn't have the brain capacity after this past week to do it.  The second list came out so much faster than the first.  And I choose to consider that a testament of all the work that God has been doing in me...after all, He is teaching me how to go with the flow, remember?

30 Things, Day 10...embarrassing

10.  Describe your most embarrassing moment.

This isn't easy for me.  You see, I am an out-there sort of person.  I normally am the one causing others to be embarrassed, because I have discovered that having good, clean fun is more important to me then what others are thinking/seeing at that moment.  In fact, to make this really clearly understandable, one of the things that I get a kick out of, is seeing if I can embarrass my oldest daughter (11), who claims that I can't possibly embarrass her (thus the enjoyment of trying to do so).  So I am having trouble coming up with an embarrassing moment.
So, I guess we are going to have to go back to high school days to come up with this...
For my freshman year of high school I rode the bus.  The bus stop was in front of the Reed's house, people I sort of knew, but wasn't in the same grade as any of the three daughters.  There house was a full block over from ours, and there was no way for you to see the bus stop from my house.  Mom never knew this was happening, and I don't think I ever shared.  My older sister was two grades ahead of me, and quiet as a church mouse, so she tended to stick to herself and not get involved in anything else.  Every morning I would dread the time at the bus stop because I knew that the middle daughter was going to be there waiting for me to get there so that she could pull my pants down and laugh her head off.  I wore big baggy shirts on purpose, fully aware that this was going to happen.  And pretty much on a daily basis, for awhile, it happened.  It was embarrassing...but looking back, it could have been so much worse.  The one guy at the same bus stop never looked.  It was always done way before the bus arrived, so really the only people that saw my grandma-style whitey tighties was the girl who pulled my pants down.  My sister wasn't looking and neither was the guy.  It continued until I started wearing overalls...lots and lots of overalls! 
Compared to the bully-ing that is going on now days, that was nothing.  Just a little momentary embarrassment.

30 Days, Day 9...influential people

                               9. List 10 people who have influenced you and describe how.
1.  Jesus Christ, without whom I would be nothing.  He modeled for me the way that I want to behave, how to unconditionally love and reach out to all those around me, how to put the Father's will above my own, and how to make the ultimate sacrifices for the ones I love.  I owe Him everything!
2.  My mother.  A stay-at-home mom for the entire time I have known her.  :)  A prayer warrior who is quick to admit to her own human-ness and quick to support all those around her.  Who loves everyone she ever met, and knows no strangers.  Someone who has always had a hunger for learning and a talent for crafting and singing.  Growing up, I didn't realize how good I had it...now, the ultimate achievement would be to be like her!
3.  Betsy.  This woman has a hunger and thirst for God and growing that is contagious!  She is outgoing, fun-loving, and understands the value of laughter.  She is quick to make fun of herself, and to share her flaws and growth and what she is learning/working through with all those around her.  Making her all that much more contagious to be around.  And she has some of the most interesting things happen to her...the stories she has to tell!  She is even a cancer survivor (like 7 times now I think).  And she is uber talented!  And very encouraging!  She makes me want to be more like her!
4.  Charles Grosby.  He was my Sunday school teacher when I was young, and he sowed some crazy important seeds into my life.  He came to my high school graduation and I spent time in his house with our two families.  Much of my thoughts on how a man should treat his wife, came from watching this man love and support his wife.  And a lot of the Christian foundation that I have is due to the words of this man.  Incredible man with a heart for God.
5.  Kelly.  She is one of our leaders in our community group at church.  She is living a life sold-out for God, willing to come alongside anyone and challenge them in their walk.  She tells it to you straight, and helps you not get stuck in your junk.  She loves unconditionally.  She will drop everything to help out a brother/sister in Christ.  She has helped me to work through some big things and to keep moving forward.  And she has a very personal relationship with Daddy God that is amazing!  She is yet another gal that I would love to be compared to!
6.  Heather.  Have you ever had a friend who will just love on you completely, but call you on things at the same time?  This is what I have in her.  She knows how much I want to be growing and actively seeking God (because she is doing the same in her own life)...she knows what God has been telling me and asking of me...and she holds me to it.  When I wander off the path, she lets me know, and puts her arms around me and points me back to the One I temporarily lost sight of.  She would literally give me the shirt off her back (and then laugh at the sight of me in it!).  And she challenges me to walk the straight and narrow.  Life would not be the same without her in it...God knew that I needed a little extra help staying in line :)
7.  My dad.  It amazes me to no end that he could live on what little he made every year, and provide for all six of his children and his wife, debt free.  And he was always helping others too.  His life philosophy has always been to live for God first and foremost, and to give... we heard the comment "you can't out give God, but you sure can have fun trying" a lot growing up.  The finances probably didn't "work on paper", but there was always food on the table and clothes on our backs.  His example of making it work has influenced so much of my life, and helped to make me strong enough to start over when my life fell apart.  And knowing that he is supporting me is huge, too!
8.  My older sister.  I watched my sister's life fall apart when her husband died...I had already been "watching" her my whole life by then.  I saw how she went to Grief Share (support group that she ended up leading later on) and just kept putting one foot in front of the other.  I watched her grow and blossom as God healed her.  And then, when it was my turn, and my life fell apart, I did the same thing.  I went to Divorce Recovery (twice), pulled closer and closer to God, and am able to see myself growing now.  I will always be one of my sister's biggest cheerleaders!
9.  Laura.  She is another single woman, and leader in my community group, that teaches from the heart.  My first study with this group was on God's Whispers and it literally changed my life.  She taught us (and shared her own experiences) that God wants to talk to us on a daily basis.  While I have known God for a long time, this had never crossed my mind.  It was eye-opening and part of me wishes I had learned this years before.  I have been journaling to God on one side, and letting Him journal back to me on the other, in my daily quiet times ever since this lesson.  I am so thankful for the way that Laura lets God speak through her, and for the time that she spends in preparation for our Sunday classes.
10.  John.  Here is another of my best friends.  And he will tell you that there isn't anything influential about him, that its no big deal, that he isn't doing anything special.  But I beg to differ.  This man is one of the most laid back, go with the flow guys I have ever met.  It is hard to ruffle his feathers.  He is always helping those around him, even if it is incredibly inconvenient and he never asks for a thing in return.  He is quick to be thankful and appreciative when others do anything for him.  He is human, just like the rest of us, don't get me wrong, but he has helped me to practice boundaries, given me a safe guy to be around, as well as a sounding board when I needed one, and has invested time into my girls that is priceless.  Being around him has rubbed off on me, and I am much more able to go with the flow, without getting upset or bent out of shape.  He won't ever know it, but God has used him in my life a lot!
Sorry, but I have to add an 11th...
11.  Wandamom.  This woman chose me to build up a relationship with when I was in college '97-'98.  She was there for me when I got a concussion on a mission trip in Canada, nursing me all the way back home and then once we got back to Maryville...and I don't remember any of it.  She let me tag along when she went on road trips.  She has let me talk for hours, listening and giving great advice.  And then, we found each other again on facebook and she started this all up again...but she is in TN and I am in MO...she still lets me talk things through with her.  She and her husband have breathed so much belief back into me that it is not possible to put into words the influence that her love has had on my life.
And there are so many more people who have sowed into my life...changing it completely!  There is not enough blog space or type to put them all here...so I will cut myself off now...