Have you ever had a time when you just felt overwhelmed...that life just no longer seemed to make any sense and you were wondering why you bothered?
I have been questioning a lot of things lately. Seems the only constant in my life right now is God. He is the only thing that hasn't changed and won't change. There is a lot to be said for that. I have been making a major move toward Him lately and I don't regret that at all.
I can't control much about my life. But if I choose to just sit there and do nothing...to wallow in the craziness...I am missing out. I can decide, no matter what is going on around me, no matter how much changes, to keep moving towards Him. And when I do, the rest of it gets smaller and smaller.
I am hoping, one of these days, that I will be so resting IN Him that the rest of all this doesn't keep throwing me for a loop or overwhelming me. He is all I really need. And in the grand scheme of eternity...the rest of the stuff doesn't matter.
So, who cares if I have no clue where we are going to live after June! God already knows the answer and He will take care of it.
So, I can't control my relationships! It's all good...God is working in even those as we work together. And the closer I get to Him, the better the relationships turn out.
I can't heal my daughter, who is now in her third week of off and on temperatures and there is no longer an explanation for them. God is the Great Physician...He knows exactly what is going on and He gifted her with the brain that quickly catches up to the rest of the class even after absences...and He put Spring Break in last week so that we haven't missed nearly as much school as we would have otherwise.
I sometimes feel like a complete failure and that people should just give up on me...that all I seem to do is hurt when I am not trying to...that life makes me feel too vulnerable and I dislike that strongly. But God will NEVER give up on me...or you. He chose us. He wants to be with us and share life with us. He created us for relationship...with Him and with others.
So, I tend to be a little rash and do things without thinking. I HATE it when people are angry at me and I can't fix it. I have a problem with opening my mouth and inserting my foot. Even in those things, God is still in control and helps me to apologize and just leave it in His hands as He works in the other person at the same time that He is working in me.
God is enough. And now it is time for that to truly sink into my very being so that I can start living like I believe it. Help me to truly believe, Lord! I want my life to show You!
"And I am convinced and sure of this very thing, that He Who began a good work in you will continue until the day of Jesus Christ [right up to the time of His return], developing [that good work] and perfecting and bringing it to full completion in you." Philippians 1:6
