The idea of safe and safety took on a whole new meaning for me this weekend. There was an incident that completely changed my view of being able to give my daughters sanctuary and safety in this house. It no longer felt possible. All because of one person's threat.
To say it threw me for a loop would be an understatement. It shook this momma heart to the core. It tested every cell of my body to see whether or not I was going to keep believing that God was bigger...that He was enough, even in this.
I spent an entire weekend holed away at my sister-in-law's apartment. I was emotionally overloaded. I cried at the drop of a hat...spaced out...wanted to scream in anger that again my life was being shaken by the decisions of another person.
And then, I came home. And its still four outer walls with windows and doors. It isn't what protects us. It doesn't really make us safe or not safe. My safety, and that of my daughters, is found in Christ alone. He died on the cross so that I might have a personal relationship with Him, His Father, and the Holy Spirit. My safety is there. No matter what happens around us, we are still safely tucked under His arm. That is where I feel safest...sometimes He helps me to physically feel that safeness while tucked under a human's arm or in a hug. Its a gift from Him that I do not take for granted.
I may not be able to make my kids feel as safe now as they did before "the incident" but they know that their mom, and their dad, will do everything in our power to keep them safe from harm. Their school has an excellent system for situations like this and helped me to feel really good about "letting" them go to school on Friday. And God has our back. He has shown us that over and over in the last year and a half and this weekend He reminded me of that again and again.
I firmly believe in the power of prayer. I am beginning to think that when we pray we are releasing angels to protect us and fight the spiritual battles on our behalf. God IS big enough. He can protect us every step of the way. And He also sends people into our lives to help us to physically feel and remind us of that protection He has for us. He is good! And I am so thankful that I have a relationship with Him during the craziness of life...the times that life feels more like a soap opera then normal life.
